It was on the festive day of Diwali, that I embarked on a 40hr train ride to my hometown.
Travelling on Diwali ?, you ask…traveling during the “festival of lights”, travelling when everyone is with their family or loved ones and celebrating…YES, YES , YES for the 100’th time yes. I had booked my ticket for this day well in advance, it was an honest mistake, I had no clue (No wonder I got the tickets so easily), it could happen to anyone, you don’t need to hound be for eternity on this….I have been laughed upon enough by everyone….Period...
Anyways moving on…..yes… so as I was saying ‘I was on this train” and I was looking ahead to this boring, uninteresting, long, drab journey. The only thing keeping me going was the fun and frolics awaiting me at the other end of the country where I was attending the marriage of one of my cousin’s.
So I boarded the famed “Jhelum Express” or as some people say “Zalim Express” (owing to long travel time) and occupied my seat (Side Lower). I always gave this seat as my preference while booking a ticket as I hoped against hope that someday a beauty will sit next to mw and I will have my fair chance to woo her without the interference of my fellow compartment-mates.
This time too I was hoping that by some miracle a hottie would come and occupy the seat next to mine or at least the one of the 6 adjacent ones. But I knew better than this, in my entire log of train journey’s, which are quite a number, there has hardly been an occasion when the fate has been generous to me and has provided me with the companionship of a gorgeous chick with ample pulchritude.
As excepted, soon a nonchalant fellow came and claimed the seat next to me and the adjacent 6 ones were occupied my a family of Kashmiri pundits( You can say Indian Jews…no offence meant). So there went all my plans down the drain or in this case down the train.
I had a quiet and early dinner and then retired to the upper berth. During dinner the elderly patriarch of the family sitting besides did try to initiate conversation with me, but the apparent lack of interest shown on my part soon dissuaded him. After all who was interested in listening to the woes of an old man.(My mistake, you will find out why). I also thanked the railways in my mind for providing curtains in the AC 3 tier which are usually exclusively in AC 2 tier as this would help in minimizing the interaction with the adjoining bunch of people.(Soon I was going to curse the railways).
Around 10.30 pm, I was awakened from my light somber by voice of a girl, coming from the adjoining seat.
I sat up and looked, but the confounded old man had drawn the curtains. Damn you railways!
So it was left to my imagination to give a face to that gentle voice which had made my heart miss a beat or two.
As time went by, my curiosity and interest in the fairer sex grew, and I began eavesdropping on the conversation the chick was having with the oldie....although they were speaking loud enough for me to hear so you see I can’t be blamed entirely.
The next one hour was spent listening to their conversation and making some derivations out of them:
1. She was talkative (Score)
2. She was from my home town. (Big Score, mommy would be happy)
3. She was in her early twenties (Schweet )
4. She was pursuing her MBA (well educated…nice)
5. She was traditional, cultured and polite (Me likey )
So in short she was perfect, I couldn’t understand why the hell was I so excited but my mind had already started to imagine the future of us TOGETHER. My heart was pumping blood as if I had run a 4 minute mile. For heavens sake I hadn’t even looked at her face.
The pessimist in me stated that there was a high probability that the face behind the sweet voice would not be of “Helen if Troy’ but that of the hideous Medusa, if not more.....After all me and lady luck were not in good terms, especially when it came to chicks.
My thoughts were interrupted when the dame got up from her seat and walked towards the loo. Aa ha..now’s my chance I thought….I quickly got up from my seat jumped down and positioned myself along the entrance of the bogie. So that when she comes out form the loo, to her I may only appear as sleepless guy standing by the door getting some fresh air.
Wow! What a planning, if only I had devised such devious plans for my career….well that’s another story.
So there I was ready to put my first gaze on what could be my better half..(Boy what a despo).
And then it happened she came out, our eyes met for infinitesimal duration and she walked past me towards her seat.
Is that it?…Well whom am I kidding…what was I supposed to say “How you doing? “..naah…that only works in sitcoms.
But the point is I was finally able to put a face to the voice a face which was much prettier then my dull imagination. The gentility, the tranquility, the calmness was oozing from her face… (Man I was smitten’d in the very first sight).
My desire to have a conversation with this walking piece of art was uncontrollable now, but by the time I came back to my seat she had retired to her berth and the only face in my view was that of the old man poking his head out of the curtain.
He asked me if I too was having trouble sleeping. My first thought was to say yes and go back to bed, but devil in me immediately devised a plan. If I became “pally” with this oldie it would be much easier for me to break the ice with the chick, he might introduce me to her and if I managed to impress him (somehow) might even throw couple of good things about me. So here I was, all set to have this oldie as my “wing man”. Labor of love, I tell you.
So there I was sitting and yapping with senior citizen at midnight, listening about his entire clan and what they do. Listening to his story of how he rose from rags to riches. Two hours later finally the oldie decided to call it a night (thank heavens for that). I had tried my best to come across as a good boy the sort that old people like, very respectful of elders and all that shit. I had acted my part in all sincerity and now I was just waiting for the sun to rise and see the seed that I had planted grow into tree and bear fruits.
Thus engulfed in my blissful thoughts, sleep finally engulfed me. The next morning when I got up I was feeling unusually fresh…need I say why. The curtains were still drawn, it seemed there was no end to my ordeal. But I was hopeful, soon as the sun rose high , the curtains between us will part to reveal a gleaming face full of joy and I will get a fair chance to woo my dame.
But as the time went by, there seemed no end to agony and wait. The condition hadn’t changed from last night. I could just hear the chick yapping with oldie’s wife and other members of his family. What was this …we are in a public mode of transport….there should be no room for this private conversation…..it should be banned. I was literally going bonkers, waiting like a fool there. Waiting for a chance…just one chance. What was my “wing man” doing, what was the point of all those hours wasted last night, if this was going to be the outcome. I was being tormented by my thoughts and was getting restless and impatient.
And then it happened, out of no where it hit me, without a warning it came, like a sniper’s bullet the skull Bamm!!
On being asked by the wife of my supposed “wing man”, what was the purpose of her visit, her reply was “Oh, for my engagement”.
What? I repeat what? Did I hear that correctly, EN fucking GAGEMENT? What the hell was she saying? My mind wanted me to believe that this was some ploy by the crew of “candid camera”. Perhaps I had heard it all wrong. Maybe she had actually said “Oh, for my BROTHER’s engagement”. But as the conversation continued my fears came out to be true and there I was left in a state of limbo.
So this was it, here ended my small love story before it actually got a chance to start. Life’s tough.
The rest of the journey progressed as uneventfully as it could, or so it seemed to me.
I saw her couple of times more
She didn’t look that pretty anymore.
